I love tears!!!
There was a time when I hated to cry. Even then, tears were something I was never able to resist. I would cry at the drop of a hat! The reason was insignificant- hurt, joy, anger, beauty- anything that moved my heart seemed to excite my tear glands. I thought tears rendered me a ‘delicate darling’ image as that of the female characters in the soap operas, which I don’t have high regard for. Still, all my efforts to look ‘strong’ by not crying were in vain!
Then came a time, when I realized that it is a blessing to be able to cry! By then, I had met a lot of people- some, mere acquaintances and some, close friends- who were not able to cry, even if they wanted to. “How I wish I could cry it all out…tears wouldn’t just come!”, some used to say! That was a phenomenon I could hardly relate to.
And, slowly and steadily, I realized that I had grown selective as to when I shed tears. I wouldn’t cry when I felt helpless; instead I would have a wry smile on my face! When I faced impossible situations, I would rather think how to maneuver through them, than cry in self pity. At times, I would pause in the middle of the mad rush, to see a ‘bold and beautiful’ me, and would say in my heart “Girl, you’ve become tough!” I tried to be unaffected by the misery around me and acted fearless, as I believed that I was conditioned to be strong! But the drama would end in a couple of days- I would succumb to tears on my pillow- far from the madding crowd- and cease to be alien to the real me! That’s when I seek God, and would be vulnerable, only to Him!
Today, I don’t care if I cry…I don’t resist tears anymore…I no longer feel weak when I cry, because I know that Jesus wept, and He was the manliest man ever, to live on this earth!!!
As the nature, God’s workmanship, elicits in me an irresistible awe for my Creator King; As my heart wells up in thanksgiving to Him for His grace that sustains me; As I feel so undeserving for the awesome people in my life; As I am challenged by the selfless act of a friend; As I feel one with the pain of a dear one; As I begin to believe, all over again, in the inherent goodness of man- my eyes glisten with tears, and boy, these tears- they sure look good on me!!!
Then came a time, when I realized that it is a blessing to be able to cry! By then, I had met a lot of people- some, mere acquaintances and some, close friends- who were not able to cry, even if they wanted to. “How I wish I could cry it all out…tears wouldn’t just come!”, some used to say! That was a phenomenon I could hardly relate to.
And, slowly and steadily, I realized that I had grown selective as to when I shed tears. I wouldn’t cry when I felt helpless; instead I would have a wry smile on my face! When I faced impossible situations, I would rather think how to maneuver through them, than cry in self pity. At times, I would pause in the middle of the mad rush, to see a ‘bold and beautiful’ me, and would say in my heart “Girl, you’ve become tough!” I tried to be unaffected by the misery around me and acted fearless, as I believed that I was conditioned to be strong! But the drama would end in a couple of days- I would succumb to tears on my pillow- far from the madding crowd- and cease to be alien to the real me! That’s when I seek God, and would be vulnerable, only to Him!
Today, I don’t care if I cry…I don’t resist tears anymore…I no longer feel weak when I cry, because I know that Jesus wept, and He was the manliest man ever, to live on this earth!!!
As the nature, God’s workmanship, elicits in me an irresistible awe for my Creator King; As my heart wells up in thanksgiving to Him for His grace that sustains me; As I feel so undeserving for the awesome people in my life; As I am challenged by the selfless act of a friend; As I feel one with the pain of a dear one; As I begin to believe, all over again, in the inherent goodness of man- my eyes glisten with tears, and boy, these tears- they sure look good on me!!!
posted by Sarah at
Friday, December 08, 2006
4 Comments:
Hey! Been there too. The world always tells a man that its unmanly to cry. I don't agree at all. I just let go these days.
I no longer feel weak when I cry, because I know that Jesus wept, and He was the manliest man ever, to live on this earth!!! AMEN to that!!!
all through the blog - well written and expressed! you have a way with words, DAKASEY!!!
had a question... found myself going over these words twice that you mentioned towards the end of the article: "inherent goodness of man.." are you thinking what i am thinking?
@ Padma
Yes, i think, im thinkin what u r thinkin:) (In fact, the other entry, "As i melt away" is an elaboration of the same theme)
:):):) Can relate to wat ur sayin here, and yes.....Praise God that He cried. And taught us, that its ok to cry.. Compassion doesn't make one 'delicate'... It is one of our greatest strengths! :)
Luv,
Rini
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